drawing of a monitor  Module 3 – Unit 3:  Language Focus

Making Requests and Asking Permission

Read the steps in giving an assertive response below and complete the task that follows.

Anatomy of an Assertive Response

A framework for developing assertive responses is known as the DESC script. Although not all steps are used in every situation, it is a useful tool.

Describe the situation.

Express what you think and feel.

Specify your request.

Consequences.
Source: Developed by Bower, SA, Bower, GH, 1991. Asserting Yourself, Reading, MA, Addison-Wesley as quoted in Riley, J. 2004. Communication in Nursing, 5th edition. St. Louis: Mosby. p. 11.

If you wanted to change shifts with a co-worker because you are planning a graduation party for your daughter, what would you say for each step to make an assertive request? (You will be happy to repay the favor another time.)

Describe the situation: _____________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________

Express what you think and feel: ____________________________________

_________________________________________________________________

Specify your request: ______________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________

Consequence: _____________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________


Analyze everyday language between health care workers and consider how effective and appropriate it is. Read health care workers’ comments below. Decide if each response is passive(P) or aggressive (A). Write P or A on the line.

  1. ___ (A co-worker cuts in line at the cafeteria checkout.) Umm. . . Excuse me. Maybe you’re in a hurry, but, uh, I’m in line, and well, I . . . I sort of need to get through this line and get back to my work, too.

  2. ___ Do you think you could answer the phone for once? You never get it! You think you’re so high and mighty that someone else should do it for you?! I can’t believe your attitude.

  3. ___ There’s no way I’m cleaning all the bedpans again! That’s totally out of line. Why are you always asking me to do everybody else’s dirty work? I’m not doing it anymore.

  4. ___ Sorry to bother you, Mila. It’s just that I, uh, well, I want to have a birthday party for my son next Saturday, and, uh, you probably can’t, but I was wondering. . . would you mind, um, switching shifts with me, by any chance?

  5. ___ Well, I guess I can do these blood tests by noon, too. I mean, I’ll try. Um, I have a lot of other tests to run this morning, you know, umm. . .

  6. ___ Sonia, I need to talk to you for a  second. On November 12th and 13th, I need the day off. I’m going to Vegas with my friends and nothing’s going to stop me. So don’t put me on the schedule.

Now rewrite each response above to make it assertive. You can use the Useful Language below.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Useful Language

  • Making requests

Could you . . . ?

Would you . . . ?

Will you . . . ?

Can you . . . ?

Could you possibly . . . ?

Would you mind . . . ?

Would it be possible for you to . . . ?
  • Asking for permission

May I . . . ?

Could I . . . ?

Can I . . . ?

May I possibly . . . ?

Would you mind if I . . . ?

Would it be possible for me to . . . ?

Is there any chance I could . . . ?